surat cinta

Cinta. 

Apa itu cinta? Perasaan di antara dua atau hanya sendiri.
Kapan datangnya? Ketika sudah biasa bersama hingga muncul perasaan aman, nyaman, dan bahagia.

Adalah mungkin cinta yang selalu datang bersama rindu. Namun bersama cinta pun mengalir air mata. Juga dihantui sakit hati dan kecewa hingga luka. Cinta selalu butuh waktu. Untuk berpindah ataupun tumbuh. Cinta, jika sudah tergenggam, jangan erat-erat, biasa saja.

Cinta, jika sudah menghinggapiku akan sulit jadinya.

Utama jika kamu acuh. 

Aku takut mendekap cinta karena cinta pernah menoreh luka. Siapa yang tak trauma? Bukan aku. Sekali lagi waktu hantarkan cinta untuk kudekap. Belum kupeluk, baru kupandangi takut-takut. Rasanya sudah merasuk, tapi cinta itu masih di sana. Tak berani kupeluk, sungguh.

Kilasan rasa pedih terus terbayang samar-samar di pelupuk mata.

Kau, berdiri berdampingan dengan cinta, tersenyum tanpa lelah menanti. Mungkin kau jemu, tapi tak menyerah.

Aku, dengan keraguanku, menerawang jauh melihat masa depan. Apakah kau yang di sana bersamaku, ataukah orang lain?

Akhirnya kau menyerah pada penantianmu, kau menghampiri dan menggandengku, berbisik "Jangan takut!" dan mengajakku melangkah.

Kita sedang berpetualang kecil. Aliran anak sungai atau jalan menanjak atau rintisan hujan atau dahaga dan lapar atau terik matahari. Terkadang kita tiba pada rasa letih yang mendera, namun janji delusi akan pemandangan indah yang akan sepadan membuat kaki ini tak mau berhenti melangkah.

Kita. Aku. Kamu. Cinta.
Ini sebuah petualangan kecil.

-Februari 2015

double twenty

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Secondly, it is finally the twentieth twenty seven. Since a month ago (if I'm not mistaken), I've been thinking about this double twenty. Seems special, and I hope it really is.

Being with someone in twenty months isn't so easy. Especially for him. Being with me maybe a little mistake but sweet. It is hard to face my mood, habits, and my stubbornness. But he did well so far. Even though, he often made me mad and upset and angry, but also happy and smile and laugh.

Twenty months do not a short period of time. But it is short at the same time.

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The first twenty, it is the twentieth April twentieth. The second decade of my life. Yeah, my life's getting shorter and i don't know when I will leave this life. It's a bit scaring to think about how the time flies this fast. The more pressures also come. So many things have to be done, it feels like so.

It is not easy to pass through this twenty years old. But, there's nothing that I cannot do as long as I believe that Allah never leave me even a second. And also, the parents who always be by my side and support me in their prayers and silence. 

Maturity. The biggest challenge, I think. As the time pass by, the process of being a woman from a girl could be seen in the end. The people around me, they help me to achieve that phase. The one, who often says that he loves me, he gives me strength and always be a good listener (after Allah) and always be my brother, my best friend, and my soulmate. 

Gifts. There was no gift as many as the previous birthday. But there was a surprise from the close friends. A real surprise because I really didn't have any idea of that kind of thing. Smile, that's the only way to express my emotion of happiness and being surprised. Thanks!

Double twenty. Special though. Really mean it ^_^ 

Thank God for this life.

Thanks Mom and Dad and sister for being in my life.

Thanks Kevin Gibran for being someone whom I dream to be in my future.

Thanks all friends, best friends, and close friends for bringing colours into my life and make it more alive.

What a precious twenty(s) is (are) in this year :D

Sejak kapan cinta jadi begitu sulit?

Sejak kau jatuh di dua hati.
Sejak ada yang jatuh pada masa lalu.

Sejak kapan cinta jadi begitu menyakitkan?

Sejak cinta membuatmu patah hati.
Sejak ada yang ke-dua.

Sejak kapan cinta jadi begitu menyedihkan?

Sejak orang yang kau cintai mengabaikan perasaanmu.
Sejak masa lalu lebih mendominasi.

It Has Been 16 Months Already

16 months. I never expected that we will keep being together. Yet, i have to admit that i'm a bit admiring you because of your stubborness to stay with me who is like a stone, you said. But i think it still needs more time. Much more time, dude. Will you stay?

It has been 16 months. Sometimes the memory came to me and screw it all. But, when i have fallen, it will hard for me to stand up. When i have fallen, please hold me tight.

It is cliche! What i have written is just like nothing.

What i want to say is... It has been 16 months. Try to look back what we have through, cieeee

It has been 16 months, is there any other 16 months for us? Let us see, then.

The Mine

you're the mine

the man that I love

makes everything's fine

my love flies to the roof

to the cloud and moon

and back to you

 

you're the melody of my day

with me sing along night and day

when you go away

i'm here to stay

never want to say goodbye

'cause you're the lovely mine

 

the sunny days come around

you'll be the summer breeze

you keep me safe and sound

while you make the storm sneeze

 

you're the mine

i want to own you forever

having some wine

in the frosty winter

 

you're the mine

i want to see your face

in every morning I wake

am I always in your mind?

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Love Notes

cinta itu membuat seseorang terlihat tanpa cela

sesungguhnya, cinta memang membutakan, dan juga buta

tapi di balik kebutaan sebuah cinta, di sanalah ketulusan

namun sayang, di balik cinta itu membutakan,

cinta itu membuat kita lupa bahwa tak ada yang sempurna

12 Little Things

First, the way you wanted to fix me.

Second, the way you made me slowly in love.

Third, the way you treated me.

Fourth, how we spent the days together.

Fifth, how you always be there when I need you.

Sixth, the way you made me upset.

Seventh, the way you made me silently smile.

Eighth, the way we laughed on something that wasn't really funny.

Ninth, about the ice cream, and chocolate.

Tenth, the feelings around us; love, miss, faith, anger, happy, sad, confuse, bored, etc.

Eleventh, the patience of yours on facing me in many moods of mine.

Twelfth, you are an ordinary boy becomes a special boy. I love you just the way you are because you have loved me the way I am since the first time. Thank you for have been with me for 12 months! Not an easy journey, right? :p But you're succeed ^_^

<3 K. G.